Home > Video Game, Weight Loss > Conversations with My Wii…

Conversations with My Wii…

As a side note, I’m sorry I haven’t posted in the last few days. School and stress related to school have gotten the better of me.

Remember at the start of this blog when I was emphasizing the weight loss my Wii had told me I’d achieved? Yeah. I was naive. I believed my Wii, without thinking that maybe I should double-check my weight against a bathroom scale (I didn’t realize we had one in my roommate’s bathroom…) before going off willy-nilly. Don’t get me wrong, I feel tons better since I’ve started exercising on the Wii, and my weight loss has been progressing… just not as quickly as the Wii had been telling me.

It all started two or three weeks ago…

Me: I’m going to move the Wii Fit setup into the other living room, where there’s more room to exercise and generally flail about.
Wii: I approve of this plan. Don’t forget, in the other room you had semi-shag carpeting, so you’ll have to remove the risers from the feet of the balance board before using the board to maintain accuracy.
Me: Yes, oh Wise Wii Program. I obey. [removes risers]
Wii: Thank you! Okay, Kella. Step on! … Keep still. … Keep still… Hey, are you fidgeting?
Me: No… I’m holding so still the lactic acid buildup is palpable…
Wii: Oh. Okay. Please step off me while I reboot and weigh you again.
Me: Um… Ok. [steps off]
Wii: Thank you. Measuring… Measuring… All done! Hey! You lost 30lbs in the three weeks since we’ve seen each other!
Me: Wow, really?!

A week passes…

Wii: Welcome back, Kella! Whoa, you’ve lost another 10lbs! I’m so proud of you. Have a calorie-reduced cookie!
Me: Shucks, that’s awesome! You say I’m now 167lbs! … I know I feel lighter, but not that light! I must be doing better than I thought!
Wii: Yep! Working out on me is truly that amazing!
Me: Well, golly! I should go out and post this in my blog! People have to know that this is an amazing thing!

Another week goes by…

Me: Okay, Wii. I need to start exercising more often. I’m going to increase my exercise routine.
Wii: Good thing, too… I show that you’ve gained 20lbs.
Me: In a WEEK?!
Wii: Yes. Did you have a cheeseburger?
Me: Yes, but I was on Slim-Fast the rest of the time… I’ll reset you and we’ll try this again. Maybe I was fidgeting.
Wii: I don’t think that…zzzzzzz… Whoa! Hi, Kella! How long have you been there? Want a measurement?
Me: Yes, please.
Wii: Okay then. Hop right on and we’ll get this party started… Whoa! You’re 30lbs heavier than last week! …Are you holding a midget?
Me: … This is physically impossible… Maybe if I put your risers back on.
Wii: Oh, I don’t think that will help you…hey! You’re 215lbs!
Me: You just told me I was 167 this morning, then 5 minutes ago you told me I was 194. Now I’m 215?
Wii: Oh, I don’t think so, Kella… You know, maybe it’s the type of exercises you’re doing… Some of my exercises can improve your memory…
Me: I’m going to injure you. Resync the board while I go upstairs to see if there’s a bathroom scale available.
Wii: Sure, but can that bathroom scale tell you your BMI, center of balance, equilibrium, agility, and sexual orientation?
Me: …I’ll be right back. [Hit resync, go upstairs, come back down 5 minutes later…] Okay. I’m back, and I have a number in my head.
Wii: Hi there, Kella! You want a measurement?
Me: Yes, please. I’m thinking of a number, and I’m leaving your risers on while you measure me.
Wii: Oh, that’s not wise, since the balance board is on hardwood floors instead of carpeting…
Me: Deal with it.
Wii: Measuring…Measuring… Wow! 215lbs. You’re obese! You’ve gained 30.5lbs since we last saw each other! Hey, how did you gain 30lbs in a week?!
Me: By listening to you. I’m going to increase my workout to 230 calories per session.
Wii: Well, be careful, Kella! You don’t want to hurt yourself…
Me: I’ll be fine. It’s only 100 more calories per workout. It’ll help the weight come back off faster.
Wii: Whatever helps you get through the day, Kella…

Needless to say, my apologies for going off half-cocked before verifying with the scale… The risers are staying on the board to maintain accuracy in the future, and at least 15 of those pounds can actually be attributed to me being lazy in the last few weeks and lapsing on my calorie-deficit diet plan.

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Categories: Video Game, Weight Loss
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