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Who Who Who… Happy Holidays….

AnyWho…

So I’m drinking chocolate schnapps and Slim-Fast (as y’do…), have finally finished an agonizing ordeal called “writing chapter 19 of my book”, and think to myself: “Self, this is the perfect moment to start improvising Doctor-Who-themed Christmas carols on Facebook!”

Sure. Why the hell not.

Enjoy. (And bear in mind that these were all written on the fly, under 30 seconds each, whilst tipsy. Complimentary grains of salt at the door.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Plastics roasting on an open fire
Daleks zapping off your nose
Cybermen lining up, and it’s dire
The Doctor’s busy snogging Rose
EVERYbody knows
A TARDiS randomly explodes
Sets the galaxy alight
Headless monks with their necks in a bow
Will find it hard to sleep toniiiiight…

***

I’m dreaming of a nice souffle
Just like the ones mom used to know
Where the milk’s a mystery
My shipmates? History.
And dead folks rise out of the snow…

***

I’ll be saving Christmas
You can count on me
I don’t know which face I’ll show
Or which year it will be
Enemies will find me
Where the Tardis lands
I’ll be saving Christmas
With my own bare hands!

***

Here comes Doctor Who
Here comes Doctor Who
Look he’s coming this way!
He’s got a box
Bigger on the inside
Don’t see one’a those ev’ry day!
Silence stalks him
River shot him
Caused a time paradox
Run tell Kovarian
Her time is up…
It’s a mad man in a box!

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